So very often we get mail asking us to entrust our bank account numbers to them...I was bored and decided to reply them,
I received this mail (my reply after the break line below): Hello My Dearest,My Name is Miss.Vivian Mbaye, 25 Years Old Female and never married, I am writing this mail with tears and sorrow from my heart asking for your help at this time, I got your contact while searching for a trustworthy someone who will understand my present condition and come to my rescue here in the Mission Refuge Camp here in Burkina Faso.
I have passed through pains and sorrowful moments since the death of my father.My father was the Former Minister Kenyan road. And Assistant I Minister of Home Affairs Lorna Lobos had been on board the Cessna 210, Which Was headed to Kericho and crashed in a remote area Kalong’s called, in East Kenya. The plane crashed on the Tuesday 10th, June, 2008. You can read more about the crash-through the website belowSite: http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/africa/06/10/kenya.crash/index.html
After the burial of my father, my stepmother and uncle conspire and Sold my father's property to an Italian Expert rate the shared Which Themselves Among the money and live nothing for me. One Faithful morning, I Open My father's briefcase and found out the documents Which I Have huge amount of money deposited in one bank in Burkina Faso with my name As the next of kin. I Travelled to Burkina Faso with the documents to Withdraw the money for a Better Life So That I Can take care of myself and start a new life, on my arrival, the Bank Director Whom I met in person Told me that my father's instruction to the bank Is That the money would only be release to me when I am married or present a trustee/Foreigner Who will help me and invest the money overseas. I am in search of honest and reliable person who will help me and stand as my trustee so That I will present him to the Bank for transfer of the money to His/her bank account overseas. I have chosen to contact you after my Prayers and I believe That You Will Not Betray my trust.
I put my hope and my trust in you.Though you may wonder why I am so soon Revealing myself to you Without Knowing You, well I will say That my mind convinces me that you May be the true person to help me. More so, I will like to disclose much to you if You Can helps me to relocate to your country because my stepmother Have assonate Threaten to kill me but God did not allow her to achieve her plans. The amount Deposited with my name is ($5.6 Million United State Dollars) and I Have Confirmed from the bank in Burkina Faso on my arrival.You will also help me to place the money in a more profitable business venture in your Country.
However, you will help by recommending a nice University in your country so That I can complete my studies. It is my intention to compensate you with 40% of the total money for your services and the balance shall be my capital in your establishment. As soon as I Receive Showing your positive response I will put your Interest Things into Action Immediately. In the light of the above, I will appreciate an Urgent message Indicating Your Ability and Willingness to handle this transaction sincerely with me.Awaiting your Urgent response.
Please do keep this only to your Self for now until the bank will transfer the Fund. I beg you Not to Disclose it till i come over because I am afraid of my wicked stepmother Who Threatened to kill me and Have the money alone, thank God Today That I am out from my country (KENYA) But now In (Burkina Faso ) These Where my father deposited money with my name as the next of Kin. I have the documents for the claims.Please find a place in your heart to read and understand my condition. Thanks and God bless.Sincerely Yours,Miss.Vivian Mbaye.
My reply: I am sorry to hear about that. I receive many emails from your country about dying people from plane crashes. My heart aches so much, it feels terrible! My heart actually cries and tears continue to flow like the rivers of doe.
I would really recommend that you employ some one who actually can build planes properly. Don't get china people. They may sell you a huge plane model at a high price, or they may use computer to make you see an aeroplane that doesn't really exist.
Also, may be you should jet ski to another country which can build planes. Or you should get all your people to slowly push the mountains in to the sea. Less mountains would be safer for airplane and jet rockets.
Also, I suppose bright clothes would be better. It is often dark and hard to see around. No insults but being of dark skin origin, it is hard to see. The planes may just roll over any of you while it is taking off. That is very dangerous. Maybe invest in light sticks. Would you like me to send you one? They last for 24 hours. You could use some to run to the toilet at night and quickly run back. Then you can use it for quite a long time.
Another thing you can do is to learn from the bahasirien tribe in the gulumut islands. They run about saying oulululu as they run. That scares animals away an make the animals dash away in extreme fear. It should e able to scare the airplanes too.
Finally, equip all passengers with jet flyers. When they are going to fly off, turn it on and fly back to the ground. From the jungle, shout ohlulululu an run back to safety.
I will donate money to you immediately! That is the most important thing now. I must save your country and your people. They do not call me superman for nothing. I'll call my friend bat man to come too. But since he travels in a car, he should reach in 1 week. I would email him across if I could but my Internet keeps crashing and I don't want to email him half way and the net crash. Then his leg would be there while is body is still here. Alright. We will travel there soon. How do we meet you? Choose a safe location so we won't be looking about for airplanes.
You too. Don't run around in open grounds. It may be very dangerous. We don't want to travel there to see a flatten you on the ground. Wear ultra bright clothes and shout ohlulululu as you run. Alright.
We live in dangerous times my friend. When you need help. Look to the sky and flash will be there to brighten the place so you can be seen and not be crushed by any plane.